I remember those almost 10 months that I was pregnant with Arielle as if they were yesterday – and I have a lot of things I wish I had done differently. Sorry Arielle! Over the past couple of months I’ve put a lot of thought into this list so if I seem a bit … passionate … my only excuse is that a mother’s love is one of the strongest things in the world and I am very much in love with my little Arielle and this new baby growing inside of me. Here are the 8 things I regret not doing during my first pregnancy, and what I’m doing differently this time around.
Not Taking more Pictures of my Pregnancy
I haven’t gotten much better at this but I am blaming morning sickness, a bad bout with Covid, and winter in general. I am just not a cold-weather person so going out and having my picture taken when it’s chilly out is just not my favorite thing to do. But as the weather warms up, I’m going to try and have more photos taken, beyond the maternity shoot I have planned for April.
Not Enjoying and Cherishing this Time More
This is another hard one specifically because of the toll pregnancy takes on my body. I am definitely not one of those lucky women who is glowing from day one. But I’m doing my best to enjoy every milestone, every appointment, every kick (yes, I’ve been feeling kicks since about 14 weeks believe it or not) from inside of me that I can because I know this probably will never happen again to me.
Not Properly Documenting our Gender Reveal
I had no idea that people made such a big deal about gender reveals. I just had a small party with close family and a cake – which was so special. But I don’t have a great picture from that night and I guarantee that the look on my face when I saw that pink stripe of frosting between the layers of cake was one for the books. So this time we’re actually having our party at a photographer’s studio and truthfully the person I am most excited to see react is Arielle. She is convinced it’s a girl so it should be very interesting to see either way what happens.
Not Buying a Proper Maternity Wardrobe
I was so dead set on buying as little as possible when it came to maternity clothes. And because I didn’t really have a big enough bump until I was more than 7 months along, I really didn’t need too much. But there were definitely times that I wish I had invested in a few nice pieces so that I wasn’t relying on the same clothes over and over again. This pregnancy I’m working with a few maternity clothing brands to make sure I have the proper wardrobe when I really start to show. And I intend to show off the bump instead of hiding it like I did last pregnancy. To follow up on this, I am also going to invest in pretty nursing bras so I don’t feel depressed putting the same old ugly ones on every day and some good post-natal underwear.
Not Indulging more in Self Care
Ahhhh, how I wish I had had more massages, more spa days, more facials during my first pregnancy because having a very active 3 year old is definitely making this “resolution” a little harder. Alex sent me to a spa when we visited Newport, RI so I could have a massage, but I am overdue for a repeat experience so I think I’ll be scheduling something soon.
Not being more of an Advocate for myself in the Hospital
I could talk about this for days because I feel like so many women go through this. For one thing, I had WAY too many people in the waiting room while I was wheeling into the OR for my C-section. And then because I didn’t think to mention the fact that I have vertigo, I got terribly dizzy and started vomiting as they were cutting me open. That sensation didn’t stop for a few hours, when I had been wheeled up to my hospital room, was attempting to nurse for the first time, AND had about 10 people sitting in the room with me. I was miserable. It was miserable.
This time around I have made sure my doctor is aware of my vertigo so they can do what they can to prevent any episodes. I’ve also made it clear that it will be Alex and me in the hospital while I give birth, then Arielle will be the first person to meet this baby (and my mom since she’ll be taking care of her while we’re in the hospital) and then people will be allowed in in small groups. I know how excited everyone is going to be and I don’t blame them, but in the end the most important people in this situation is the baby and myself and that’s who I need to be thinking of first.
Not Doing a Fresh 48
We did have the hospital photographer take a few pictures of us right before we were discharged and they are lovely. But I wish I had had one of my favorite photographers come in and grab shots of us as a family right as we were getting to know each other because it is such a beautiful moment. This time around, I already have a photographer booked and on call for when it all happens.
Not doing a Proper Birth Announcement
A month after Arielle was born I put up a picture on Instagram and Facebook … and that was pretty much it. At the time I was so lucky to have a good friend (who sadly passed away last November) at my former TV station who had arranged to have Arielle’s birth announced on one of the talk shows. Later I did eventually write a blog post about it. But I didn’t send out any kind of announcement to family and friends. I just kind of text people photos. This time will be different and I can only apologize to Arielle in the future when she realizes she didn’t get all of these things.
I hope that this list is helpful to anyone going through their first pregnancy. For those who have had children, what did you regret during your pregnancy? Shoot me a DM please because I would love to know!
[…] to take care of myself other than try to keep down as much as I could and get ready for a baby. It was something I really regretted in the end because, let’s face it, as soon as you have a baby you become “mom” and there is very little […]