How We Knew it was Time for a Baby

Almost five years ago Alex and I were strolling down the Seine, talking about how someday when we retired we would live in Paris for a month, then London, and so on and so on. The rest of our trip we dreamt about where we would go, what we would do, imagining this entire nomad, ex-pat adventure we’d have in our mid-50s. 

It wasn’t until we got home that the rose-colored glasses came off. I was now 30 and Alex is a few years older. That life we planned was less than 25 years in the future. Which would be fine, except we had not factored children into the equation and that was something we had both decided we wanted to pursue. I’d even gone to therapy right before we got married to get over my fear of being a bad parent. 

But instead of working on adding to our family, I turned my focus to finding my “dream job.” The plan had always been that I would get a producing job at a top Boston news station and once I solidified my reputation I would have the opportunity to take time off for maternity leave. A month after we returned from Paris, I started what I thought would be that dream job at that top Boston news station. It was a quick process, quicker than I like to move. But the position had presented itself and I thought it was fate dealing me a good hand. 

A few months into the position, however, I realized that this was not the job for me. I had loved going in to work every day at my last station. Now I dreaded it and every night I came home feeling emotionally and physically exhausted. Not only did I hate the atmosphere and culture, but I was also constantly in fear of losing my job and all I could think was, “how am I supposed to raise a child while I’m dealing with this?” It really did a number on my anxiety.

I ended up leaving the station in early 2017, about six months after I’d started, and swore that I was going to get as far from TV news as possible. I took a position at an engineering firm in Boston in a public relations capacity. I was so excited to be making this move, but quickly noticed that the job description I had been given was nothing like the job I was now doing and the team I was working with, including leadership, were far from agreeable. I am not going to go into too many details, mostly because things turned somewhat ugly. But I hung on because I’ve always been a fighter and I thought that I was making a difference. 

In 2018, Alex was considering making a career change after almost 10 years at his company and that meant a bit of a lifestyle change. Though I was still stuck at my miserable job, the possibility of his new title made us think about the future, which brought the topic of having children back to the table. And truthfully, as soon as we started to talk about it, we had made a decision. 

“Let’s go for it.”

Almost exactly a year later, we welcomed Arielle Marie and the rest is history!

So while the road to making the decision to have children was a long one, when it actually came time we both just knew it was right. And I know I am speaking for both of us when I say it is the best decision we ever made. Now instead of planning our nomadic life in our 50s maybe we’ll live out our adventures during summer vacations with our little one by our side. Because if there is one thing I’ve learned since becoming a mother, it’s that I love showing Arielle new and exciting places.